the many ways in which i am a terrible mother...

i sing opera. i have multiple degrees in vocal performance. but right now my *full-time job* is MOM. hunh.

right now i'm doing a show, and i just kinda let my home life go to hell in a handbasket :). for example:

• alexander completely ran out of underwear
• we haven't had any bread for almost a week (cuz i haven't had time to make any)
• the laundry was literally overflowing
• there are absolutely no left-overs in the fridge
• becuz there's no left-overs & no bread, i had to give isabelle pb&j on rosemary olive oil triscuits
• i took a 4 hour nap after church yesterday, completely neglecting the bread and laundry that were totally calling to me
  

instead of taking care of my family, i made a ton of new jewelry, which i sold to the girls in the opera chorus. making jewelry is a lot more fun (and pays a whole lot better than doing laundry *smile*), but i feel terrible that i let things get so far behind. i don't remember tech week being so grueling and exhausting. i literally couldn't do another thing yesterday when i got home after church (after buying beads for stuff i need to make for tomorrow night *smile*). i made it as far as the couch in the living room and then just collapsed. i even made isabelle find a couch pillow for me, cuz i couldn't make myself get up and find it for myself :)

a large portion of my exhaustion is, of course, my fault. every night i'd come home from rehearsal & make more jewelry for the girls in the dressing room. at this rate, i will totally be able to finance my trip to boston with the kids this summer (which has yet to be *approved*). but, seriously, what's a girl to do when we've got to sit in a dressing room for 2.5 hours waiting to go onstage? shopping is definitely the way to go, and i'm glad that i gave the girls an opportunity to spend some of the money we made sitting around for hours :)

so today is all about makeup work. i had 3 loads of laundry that needed to be folded, and i did 2 additional loads last night, 3 loads already today with one more to go. the bread is in its first resting/rising period. and i've got all the beads i need to make more beautiful jewelry for the girls at opera tomorrow night. :)

of course, the opera is totally worth it. i'm doing Dialogues of the Carmelites with Pittsburgh Opera, and even though we literally have 10 minutes of music to sing, and most of that doesn't even have words, it's a totally fabulous show. all of the leads are amazing, and pretty much the whole audience leaves crying every night. nice! :)

...and drumroll please!

i have a clean bill of health. at least from my thyroid operation. i had my blood drawn yesterday and i got the results today and everything is good! i was convinced that it wasn't. i guess that means that i'm exhausted cuz i'm staying up way too late making jewelry. and i'm fat cuz i've been eating lots of candy and snacking inappropriately. and i'm constipated cuz i haven't made granola in forever and need to up my fiber intake. and i'm scatterbrained cuz i'm a ditz. it would have been so much easier for it to all have been explained away by an under-active thyroid! :) well, i guess i just need to go back to work on myself and start writing everything down so that i can stop forgetting stuff! :)

but i have been working really hard on stuff for my upcoming show. it's at a retirement community, and i'm not sure if it's open to the public, or just residents. but i've got all of my displays. i ordered some online, and christopher is working on my necklace & bracelet displays. they're beautiful. he does such nice work. :) and i'm happy with the number of earrings i've got done, i just need to make some more necklaces and bracelets. but i don't know how many spots i'll have available on the displays chris is making. i'll hafta go count to make sure i have enough. i'm just waiting for my sign & earring cards to come in the mail, and then i'll be set! i'm getting really excited. i really love the stuff i've been making. it seems that working in the middle of the night really helps my creative juices flow. either that or the chocolate :)

my original plan was to simply duplicate a lot of the things i've already done and then augment that with some new designs, but instead pretty much everything is new! i've got a ton of pictures take already, but i've got a ton more left to do. it's rainy today, and that's usually a great day to take pics, so i'll see what i can get done today. something about the way the light difuses through the cloud cover makes for really great photos. we're also going up to our campsite, and i always get great photos up there. but we don't have electricity, so i don't know how i'll be able to recharge the camera. ever since i dropped it in the river, the battery just doesn't last as long. hopefully chris is planning on doing some work and will take the generator :)

my word can she scream!

isabelle is a screamer. i mean, a serious screamer. she reminds me of the little girls i saw on a 20/20 about young girls who were severely schizophrenic. *smile*

now, i know that she's just 2 and is just finding ways to express her anger. she's not schizophrenic. or possessed. usually i just tell her that when she's ready to settle down and use her words to come find me. but christopher tonight stayed with her until she settled down, which really prolonged the situation for an extra 1/2 hour. it gets to the point where i'm really surprised she has a voice. i don't know how anyone can scream for 1/2 an hour or more 3 or 4 days a week and not have serious vocal issues! wow! she'll be a great gospel or musical theatre singer *smile*

but i can really see how parents can have their young children diagnosed as bipolar. one second she screaming like she's possessed, and the next minute she's cuddling with me asking for the babies she's thrown all over her room. absolutely exhausting *smile*